So I have been thinking....yeah I know scary huh. Everyone makes New Years Resolution's. I have said for years I wont make them because they are too easy to break. We say we are gonna go on a diet...within a week we are shoving Mc'd's in their mouths! Gonna exercise....again shoveling food in your mouths is not considered exercise. There are numerous New Years Resolutions go made and broken within days of being made...so therefore I don't make resolutions. But as I was sitting here tonite I thought of one that I can keep!
I'M DONE "TRYING" TO BE NICE! LOL Notice I said "trying" Its not working. I can't be nice I don't know who I'm trying to fool....and all it does is stress me out. And it comes back to bite me in the ass! I help someone and I don't even get so much as Thank you or kiss my ass! I give them something and nothing. I am a people pleaser! Most of the time anyway...some may think I'm selfish and have even gone to the extent to to tell me that I am! Yeah I'm selfish...I'm selfish with my movies, I'm selfish with my money, I'm selfish with my kids, and yes even to an extent I'm selfish with my time....most of the time I will drop what I'm working on to help you with your problem! But why...what do I get by doing this? How many times can you people tell me (the ones that have said I'm selfish) dropped what your doing to help me? NEVER!!!! Unless they have something to gain from it! I'm so tired of being the one that has to take care of everyone else. Why? Since when did it become my problem you can't pay for this or that...since when is it my fault you don't have a babysitter. So I am a Stay At Home mom....that doesn't mean that I'm YOUR Stay at Home Bitch! I am not here to please you! And I'm done trying.
Or until someone wants something from me! So others aren't nice to me til it fits their means and it seems to be working for them why can't I try that? I can go around being rude, nasty and plain out rubbing in others faces about their great things....blowing my trumpet in the streets as the bible says. It works for others why shouldn't I try to be like that.
I'm going to go out of my way to completely speak my mind. I'm very opinionated anyway. But usually unless someone asks my opinion I keep it to myself. I don't sugar coat anything....if you want someone to lick your wounds ask the your mommy! If you want the truth come ask me, just think of me as the Wise Old Owl that found out how many licks it took to get to the center of a lolly pop.
So I think from now on I'm going to go out of my way to make sure everyone knows my opinion whether they want it or not. Like for example the people that are looking at the mildew infested house next door! Maybe they'll think I'm crazy enough it will never get sold! It's kind of nice not having neighbors and having to worry about my driveway being blocked because they don't feel that they can park over on the parking street instead of across my driveway!
I'm tired of going out of my way to make everyone else happy. My kids, husband, neighbors, customers, people at the school, and friends. When do I get to be happy? Because me trying to make everyone else happy and going out of my way to do nice for everyone else is only stressing me out! For 30+ years I have tried to be nice and make everyone else happy. My parents, then boyfriends, friends along the way, customers (in whatever I'm selling or doing at the time), my kids and my husband. I think that If i stop focusing on being so nice and just voicing my opinions rather than to sit on them and then blowing up like a volcano after so long! I might be able to be able to be more relaxed. Maybe by doing this I won't take it out on my kids so much. Maybe I won't be so wound up about someone blocking my driveway, or blocking the drop off zone....Hummm I may be on to something...
So my new years resolution is............................To stop "trying" to be nice. I'm just going to be me! If you don't like it.......please find the door! Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya!
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